Create a Balanced Life in Three Steps
Upgrade your life with the 3 Essentials to Create A Balanced Life. Most people dislike “rules” or “laws” when they are applied in the context of social development, but the “essentials” of the three-step process should be read as immutable, unwavering laws. Without strict adherence to each essential step, one cannot find the peace one seeks, nor the ability to be emotionally available and engage in functional, healthy relationships. Each step is a requisite step in the process of creating a healthy and complete version of self. Think of each essential step as a rules that is not suggestive in nature, but rather directive.
Release – Balance – Focus
Step 1. Release
All that has happened lies in the past but it is now history. Past experiences usually affect us long after the initial impact. They shape our thoughts, what we become and our emotional content. They give us a framework against which we weigh present decisions and create future outcome. Not all of our past events were positive and the emotional baggage rings in our ears like it happened yesterday. We give undue weight to matters that we cannot change. By failing to release these negative emotions, we unknowingly bring them into our future, affecting our present and future relationships, careers, financial paths and health. Creating a balanced life depends on our ability to release the past.
To some degree, everyone has experienced traumatic and emotionally disruptive life-events. There is no way to insulate ourselves from trauma end emotional injury. These types of events are simply part of our life journey. More importantly, there is no guarantee that one won’t share in a deluge of traumatic events in the future. Life offers no certainty in this regard. We are not guaranteed a trouble-free life. We can, however, control our emotional response to such events. We decide if they are going to affect our present or we allow them to define our future. I do not discount the severity of some traumatic events, and the effect this has on some people.
In fact, some events are so traumatic they create a physical, biochemical change in the human body. Epigenetic change is a well known event in survivors of, or witnesses to, a traumatic event. For example, child abuse scars not just the brain and body, but, according to the latest research, but may leave its mark on genes as well. Published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, the data suggests that abused children and childhood trauma may induce epigenetic changes. This may result in post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) that creates a biologically distinct form of the disorder types when trauma is experienced later in life.
The first step in living a vibrant, optimistic and balanced life rests in letting go of the pain, uncertainty and challenges that are yesterday’s experience. Releasing deep wounds may time time and care. For some, this might require professional counseling and a significant amount of emotional and community support. Regardless of the time and effort healing and transformation requires, it is the first and most important step on your path toward building healthy, loving relationships.
Be courageous and ruthless in releasing the past from your grip on today. Take control and build the limitless life of which you dream.
Step 2. Balance
Find your balance. Start by affirming that change is not only possible, but a prerequisite to achieving your broader goal of a sustainable, healthy life. You define your future with today’s choices and swift, decisive action will launch your bright tomorrow. Work is usually the single biggest detractor from a balanced life. Numerous studies have been conducted on work-life balance. According to a major Canadian study conducted by Lowe (2005), 1 in 4 employees experience high levels of conflict between work and family, based on work-to-family interference and caregiver strain. If role overload is included, then close to 60 percent of employees surveyed experience work-family conflict. (See, Download Implications of Work-Life Balance and Job Stress PDF or see Under Pressure) In one survey of physicians, control over work schedule was the greater predictor of reported work life balance. See, Implications of Work-Life Balance and Job Stress.
While this is often easier said than done, adopting a balanced life action plan is a great starting point. Having swept the majority of the emotional waste that once tightly held its grip on your joy and optimism, seek a balanced life of wellness, self-awareness, community and purpose. Embrace the change that is yours and explore new and healthy challenges: seek a new fitness plan; try a new meal plan; volunteer or join a community group; actively reach out to your network of friends and friends of friends; strengthen old bonds; pursue a new hobby; redefine your goals.
Your fresh routine will drive an active, social and healthy life filled with people who love and support your best interest.
Step 3. Focus
Recreate your life by doing what you love. Follow your plan to focus your life on the people and things that you love most. Focus on your new relationships and passion. Enjoy the renewed sense of self and optimism that each day brings when the sun shines on your back. While we can neither erase nor forget the past, you can use the those experiences to avoid creating patterns and habit.
Take stock of the great things in your life and lock them into your mental framework. These new and wonderful experiences, and dynamic, supportive relationship are your building blocks on which your emotional rebirth will be based.
Enjoy your renewed journey into a world that loves and embraces the greatness that lies within your spirit. The future is yours to define.
Have you had moments in which letting go seemed to be an impossible task?
Do you wonder when the Release phase will end so you can start to move on?